In my many personal experiences as a young, Black man, I find that the system of courtship in our generation has decayed immensely. This is not to say that we should revert to the methodical and purified ways of dating from the 1950s, but it can be agreed upon that certain standards cannot be compromised. I presently find it quite astounding when a beautiful young lady is approached by a young man who then begins into a harangue of bad grammar, profanity, and sexual innuendos and manages to create interest from the young lady. Why is it that so many [black] women can be seduced by a man whose rear end hangs out his pants, who wears a shirt that is clearly five sizes too big, and whose understanding of the English language doesn’t extend past the basic letter sounds? I notice also that women who are approached by urbane, sophisticated men with formidable wordplay skills are denied by attractive women for being “too serious”, or “too uptight”, or worse, “gay”. Since when does speaking ability, appropriate dress, and genuine interest in a woman equal gay? And if these men are shown some interest, it is because they are seen as an asset, rather than opportunities for relationships. And why can’t women shape up as well? Beautiful women come a dime a dozen, but a dignified woman who wears her sensuality rather than using it, a woman who recognizes etiquette and recognizes in men, and still let a gentleman be a gentleman is quite a jewel. Sexuality has permeated the seas of pop culture like an oil spill rendering the teachings of our ancestors ineffective. But I do join the movement away from real courtship, which is less bout bravado and verbal foreplay, and more about intellect, self-awareness, and really trying to understand another human being.
What about your thoughts???
Picture courtesy of MyNippon.com
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- Paul Beasley
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